Intro to Star Wars Episode E3: The Fandom Menace

Like most cabbies in LA, they ain't doin' a damn thing

Faux buckskin and velour heels were oh-so-trendy back in 986 AD

Why do women always get in the way when you're trying to take a picture of a damn car?

Konami is the Japanese word for "All we got is Metal Gear Solid 2"

Sequel central

Go ahead and laugh...in 30 years when forehead photography is a multi-million dollar industry, I'll be in the chips

The girls in Unison actually had more up front than these gals did...it's sad that I actually knew that

Velma from Scooby-Doo, heading to the Playstation 2 booth

Midway through the show, the Nintendo booth fell over

The Japanese are surprisingly well-adjusted to disaster...this guy is all smiles, even as a deadly lava flow passes over his head

Luigi's Mansion, filmed in Fuzz-o-Vision

Those Game Boy Advance screens are a lot bigger than you think

This PS2 was online via broadband...unfortunately it was using Netscape, so nobody could tell

The giant Borg bowling ball from the "Star Trek: Borg Bowl-a-Rama" display

The closest I got to the Sega booth, since you had to make an "appointment" to see their games. Ok, Sega...make an "appointment" with us gamers when it's time to buy the damn things

Luckily, the one on the right was good at CPR as well

No photos of "Jak and Daxter" were allowed, as this photo clearly illustrates

After last E3, I was determined to get a closer parking space

Kinetica, a missed opportunity. A game where your racer lays face-forward on the track, yet none of the female racers wear skirts?

One of the better booth babes this year

In Ace Combat 4, an F-14 Tomcat can achieve low-earth orbit

Amazingly good peripherals from these guys

I actually can't tell what this was supposed to be

More Jak and Daxter that wasn't allowed to be photographed

Screenshot from the X-Box version of "SimCity: Urban Decay" featuring Los Angeles

Meddling kids

Unfortunately I didn't have my id handy, but my ego got me in

Much like real life, the WWF crowds were pretty small

It's just not E3 without Spongebob

Moments later, they both kicked the hell out of this guy for making them touch him

Once again, you can HAVE the one on the left

Super Smash Bros Melee

Super Smash Bros Melee (say it 3 times fast)

Starfox Adventures. It's a space game, without the space

Rogue Leader. Never underestimate the power of the Dark Side.

You will buy this game.

What the hell was this?

Great...finally get a good shot of the Nintendo projection display and it's Yoshi's ass

Even more Jak and Daxter, of which no photos were allowed

Kinetica, for those unable to read "hip, happening, in-your-face" fonts

Drakan II. Yes, apparently it does exist

I'm not sure what it is, but many Japanese visitors were leaving their children as offerings

If it's not Scottish, it's CRAP

Koei something-or-other

Dark Cloud stars the hero of FF7's evil twin

More Nintendo

"Everyone's a Loser" would've been more appropriate

Potentially deadly hanging display

That's a French missile by the way...you can tell because it has "US Air Force" stencilled on

This man arrived in a taxicab. That he owns.

All I saw was "XXX" and I was on my way

Or at least I was, anyhow

Nvidia was everywhere

Namco's booth was worth the trip, as usual

Yet another Bond game. Why is this dork so popular?

Universal had some decent stuff to show, also

Did you know Universal owns Sierra now?

Crash is back, and oddly enough, the new game is as different as it's 3 predecessors

Capcom again

Halo, howya doin'?

Capcom's big on GBA

Interact's booth, complete with cheaty-boy-I-can't-finish-the-game-normally Gamesharks.

At the MadCatz booth, Quake 3 players showed everyone just why playing FPS games with the Panther XL is something to be avoided at all costs

The best looking gal at the show ended up being 2-dimensional and not much to talk to

The only two guys I know who can get drunk off of Sprite

Blurry X-Box screens

The scale in this photo is misleading...the X-Box is about the size of a U-haul pull trailer

The Warcraft III displays were constantly busy

You can smell the stink of this game already

Sherbet Queens of the Nile

Unleashed...but only if you had an appointment. Pricks

This actually happens a lot in LA

That's IDSA-speak for "It's crowded and smells like unwashed geekboys. Get out."